Come Sup’ with Me
I don’t like dinner parties. Oh, you don’t either? You don’t like all that fussing and the stressed host and the awkward conversations and the lights on too bright in the living room and all the silly courses that really only make sense if you have a manservant and who has a manservant these days, anyway? I totally hear you.
Can I tell you what I do like, in fact, really, really love? I love having people over for supper. A difference in semantics, yes, but also a totally different attitude.
Having people over for supper means someone sitting on the floor while we’re snacking on olives. It means crowding around a table of mismatched chairs and unmatched napkins. It means listening to Otis Redding, talking about real stuff, and if I am extraordinarily lucky, someone other than me suggesting an impromptu dance party or game of charades.
This is food at its best. For me, the greatest pleasure of cooking is getting to provide and share. When it’s just me, hacking at an onion is as relaxing as 90 minutes of yoga. But when there are others who will be sitting around a table with me, filling the living room with their stories and the sort of grand, creative ideas that can only be hatched in this very environment, putting dinner together is beyond the beyond. I live for that. It’s not a performance of any kind, hostessing or culinary. It’s just sharing in the most basic human need — hey, are you hungry? — and marking the occasion as more than just a base human requirement. In fact, it’s like magic.
I put together these individual flower arrangements in juice glasses and jam jars. Then I snapped some leftover summer kabob sticks in half, cut strips from a brown paper bag, and made little flags for each person, stamping their names out. The imperfect charm of rubber stamps just never gets old for me.
Betty: Are you familiar with the book “How To Feed Your Friends With Relish”? Think you’d love it!1 year ago
Julie: I just read an article in Domino about planning a fancy weeknight dinner to impress your friends. It looked wonderful, but I couldn’t help but thinking, “This isn’t what it’s all about!” Having friends over for supper is infinitely more appealing.
P.S. LOVE the flowers!1 year ago
sarah: Betty, I haven’t heard of that book, but it sounds divine. I’m going to go check it out now. Thanks for the recommendation.
Julie, You know, I read that article last night actually. I thought there were some good ideas (like putting candied orange peel and fig leaves with the cheese and that fruit and greek yogurt dessert sounded lovely), but I totally agree. You could serve your friends spaghetti and they could be “impressed.” But who cares about impressing your friends?! I just want them to have a super awesome time and want to come back, you know?1 year ago
Alicia Kachmar: Even though I call them “dinner parties,” I suppose they are much more like your supper idea: informal, good food and conversation, casual. But fun!
I too understand the cooking for people thing…actually, I wrote this guide to being a “domestic goddess” in NYC: http://www.guidespot.com/guides/how_be_domestic_goddess You would appreciate it. Nigella Lawson says about cooking, “It’s doesn’t interest me if I’m not feeding people.”1 year ago
sarah: Alicia, Okay, so I call them “dinner parties” too — sometimes it’s just easier. Love that quote from Nigella, and I’m going to go read your article right now — sounds totally up my alley.1 year ago
(other) Sarah: Here in my tiny apartment, the biggest room (besides the bedroom) is the kitchen. Way bigger than the living room. So inevitably, whenever we have people over it becomes a kitchen party, which I is my favourite kind of party anyway. Lots of people crowding around a table, playing cards and snacking on treats I’ve made. Good times!
PS - I love that we have the same name, tee-hee! It’s always fun to load a blog and see your name sticking out of a beautiful bunch of flowers!1 year ago
EB: “hacking at an onion is as relaxing as 90 minutes of yoga” you really are a girl after my own heart.1 year ago
sarah: A kitchen party! That is even better than a supper party! I love it. Someday I hope I have a kitchen a bit larger in size to accommodate a bit wooden farmhouse table with benches so we can have just this kind of meal.1 year ago
sarah: EB, It’s certainly more time and cost-effective, that’s for sure.1 year ago
Kat: hey, it’s good to see you back. I have never had friends over for supper .. but I’m thinking it’s time. I worry about too many kids in a too small house. But you know, there will never be less children (not that I would want there to be) and if I wait to have a bigger house, having friends over for supper may never happen! Thanks for the inspiration!1 year ago
sarah: too many kids in a too small house sounds like wild fun.
if you’ve always wanted to, why not? but if it’s just not something that appeals to you, why bother? there are plenty of other ways to tell the people in your life you love them.1 year ago
ren: i know what you mean about sharing a meal with people. i am so lucky that my husband came with a giant living room table. one of my favorite things ever is sitting around it and sharing a meal with a variety of people. i come close to tears everytime.
i haven’t given much thought to the word supper, but will reflect on it now. thank you!1 year ago
Sarah: hi renee! i didn’t realize how much i had missed you till i saw your name just now. i think supper is really just an old fashioned word for the evening meal, back in the days when people still called lunch “dinner.” but you know me — i love old things, whether it be a turn of phrase, more, or a dress.
1 year ago
Evon T.: The idea is too cute and so are the little arrangments you made. I think I have to get over the whole idea of HAVING to impress my friends more than a little bit. I want my friends to be able to relate to my home and get a great home-cooked meal at the same time. Luv you Sarah! I like the way you break things down and “keep it real”.1 year ago
Naomi: I am all about comfort which is reflective in everything I do-kids, cooking, crafting, my laid back dog (basset hound/springer spaniel mix), friends, furniture and a French professor told me that I have a comfortable face!!! I LOVE preparing comfort food especially soups-mmm potato carrot, leek and potato, sausage tortellini et. al. while my kids/friends relax with a glass or two. It is such a warm process which is what supper is all about isn’t it?1 year ago
Sarah: evon, it can be hard to get over trying to “impress” your friends, since that’s pretty much what most magazines and books make it seem like that’s what entertaining’s about. maybe you could get over the hump by just picking up some prepared things at the market so all you have to do is set them out and then enjoy the company of your friends? and ha! no one’s ever told me i “keep it real” but i certainly like it!
naomi, you’re dog sounds like a handsome guy! and your life sounds so relaxing and laid-back — i wish you had a blog so i could read about your tips and tricks and ways of doing things.
1 year ago
Suzanne (Zann): Sarah- Girl,I must say, yours is one of my favorite blogs to visit..like taking my shoes off after a long day at work & putting my feet up. Heck yea, you do keep it real but never (ever) mundane. I think “supper” is akin to sacred, without the drama…so powerfully homey and nurturing,and best when you’re making do with whatever’s on hand, like those wonderful little paperbag name banners you made. ooooooh lordy, now that’s down-home flare…almost better than the food itself. Your friends are lucky indeed! Now, where’s that manservant I’ve been waiting for??? hee.1 year ago
Sarah: Suzanne, you’re a hoot, and I am so flattered! As for what you wrote about supper being sacred and homey and nurturing…frankly, i couldn’t have said it better.1 year ago
rebekka: My sentiments exactly!1 year ago
Julia: I love the flowers with the name flags. I’m thinking that idea could also work for weddings, either as placecards, or with a flag sticking out of the table centerpiece to indicate table number. thanks for the inspiration!1 year ago